silent night..

...it’s strange how we often experience emotions and feelings yet we do not understand them completely nor can we describe them in exact words..

...i mean many a times in our lives we come across an moment where we fail to describe our emotions..

...i mean we feel it, experience it.. but we just can't put them in words..

...that's the beauty about emotions..

i now feel that the moment we label or tag that emotion,
we do injustice to the whole experience..

like i experienced it the other night..
somewhere in the forests of Kanha, while i sat along the riverbed to just sit and listen..

the silence silently crept in..

as i wondered at the silhouetted skyline..
then as i pulled up to the edge of the water..a tiny glow worm sparkled, as if welcoming..

it was dark..and i sat in silence,
bathing in the chilling breeze that tingled my bones,
eventually my attention drifted to the shining constellations..
which for years have been telling us so much about them..
and continues to tell so much about us..

the sky was lit with bright stars twinkling more often than usual as if to get noticed..

it was amazing how the forest which till couple of hours ago was twittering with the treetop mimic and and the jungle fowl, was now so silent..

i heard silence..
and then an unusual yet calm music in this silence..

i closed my eyes..
to listen to the sounds of the forest..

i experienced an innocent sense of wonder that initially startled me,
then lifted me into a magical realm where,
for perhaps a heady instant,
i knew, really knew that these trees could speak..

the images of the forest took over my senses..

the rising sun peeping out from the thick of the forest..
the chirpy inhabitants reminding us of the dawn..
the distant warning of the peafowl from route no. C..
the mutual association of the herd of cheetals and the langurs displaying their team antics..
the fresh pug marks indicating how closely we missed out on an encounter with the yellow stripes striding by..
the towering termite mounds..
the sambhars..
the birds of prey and the prey..
the sight of watching young cheetals wrestle playfully was exhilarating as if i myself had romped away those moments among them.

Perhaps I had.

at the sight of a flock of sailor butterflies dancing around,
i felt my heart slowly lighten and skip-hop in response to the fluttering of a hundred wings..

my appreciation of their "otherness" carried me instantly into another kind of consciousness.

in this state of mind, i was again a child, innocent, playful and wide-eyed.

it is on this unfamiliar ground that i often discover and rediscover my emotions..

i think of these as sweet memories in the making, pleasant interludes in a busy schedule.

i know these excursions are an insight to my understanding of emotions;
rather small journeys into the depths and corners of reality.

i often wonder what i could do in return for giving me these tiny spiritual retreats..
and often end up promising to spend more time with it..

to hear it..

to see it..

to smell it..

to feel it..

and in return it always gives me back something far more nourishing-soul food..

as usual i have tried to put my emotions into words..
and yet i fail miserably..

...that's the beauty about emotions..